I was reflecting on how much change actually happens when moving into a new season of life. It’s a little overwhelming to make so many changes at once! I have to stop to catch my breath and remind myself that God’s got this. New levels are never easy in the beginning and they sometimes feel like I’ve been picked up and dropped onto another planet. God doesn’t leave me in the same place for very long. He is always prodding me to move forward into the Blessing He has promised.
The last month of my therapy sessions was very difficult for multiple reasons. But the main issue in every one of them was that I was no longer moving forward, I had reached the goals God had for me in that season and as hard as it was, I knew it was time to move on.
The Lord said to Abram: Go out from your land, your relatives, and your father’s house to the land that I will show you.
During my devotions one day, the Lord gave me Genesis 12:1 with the understanding that He was asking me to put the therapy on the altar and be willing to go to a land that He would show me. It was a difficult test but I really wanted to be obedient so I immediately sent my therapist an email telling her what God had revealed to me before the enemy could talk me out of it. Almost two years ago, I put the “key to nowhere” on the altar which meant that I would no longer go “away to nowhere” where I was dissociating to the level that I had no awareness of what was happening and I was losing a lot of time. So, then I was present in all my sessions and had to hear everything they were saying. Things got really difficult because I was learning things I had been unaware of until then. After a year of being present/co-conscious all the time, the Lord asked me to put the dissociation on the altar. I could not image life without my parts and even tho I hated them when I first started therapy, I had grown to love them (not realizing that I was learning to love myself). In January of 2016, I went back to the altar during a Sunday morning service. When I left the altar that day, I no longer had parts. I had been healed and all of my parts had come together to make one whole person. Life became interesting on a whole new level at that point but that’s a story for another post. I was not surprised when He asked me to put my therapy on the altar. He had prepared me well. He had even given me dreams to show me it was coming, and several times I would hear something said on the radio or I would read something and it would be confirmation that He was doing a new thing and that season of my life was ending.
God is so faithful!! He has healed me so much!!!
I realized today that the same ceiling I was hitting my head on for the last month of therapy has become the floor I’m standing on now. I when through so much supernatural healing in those three years and my therapist being Spirit-filled and willing to invite the Holy Spirit to lead my sessions made all the difference in the world.
Today, I am trying to find my footing for this new level of adventure He has sent me on. Things are rapidly falling into place with His divine provision. It really is true that all God was asking me to do was to follow Him and be obedient. He did all the work in His strength. His yoke is easy and His burden is light. I’m so thankful that He goes before me and makes my path straight.
Christmas is only 2 1/2 weeks away but walking this path with God leading the way is like Christmas all year long. It has not been an easy journey but He is always surprising me with gifts along the way…sometimes tangible, sometimes not. I love Him so much and I am so blessed to get to live this life!!