I feel like the walls of this room are not big enough to hold what is wanting to burst out of me. I feel like I need to worship, to jump, to sing, to praise, to move, to weep, to be still, but instead, in awe, I must write. An uncomfortable, passionate awe, as if I need to tell the whole world what God is doing. Only I don’t know what He is getting ready to do! I do get the concept of the “be still and know that I am God verse”, I even have a picture of it on my wall. And I am trying! I need more, I can’t be still. Come Holy Spirit!! I don’t know what to do! Instead of being still, I want to control, I want to call everybody I know and say, “Pray!! Something big is happening in the heavenly realms” Something IS moving and God is doing a new thing and I don’t want anyone to miss out on it! I am hungry for God to move. I am excited about all the miracles that have been happening around me. I am so thankful for the doors and divine relationships that He has been aligning in my life. But the glory!!! Oh my goodness, I feel as if I’m breathing anointed air. He is here! As if there is a tangible joy in it that is too big to fit inside of me. A strange feeling indeed.
Fifteen minutes ago I was crying, a moment of grieving the loss of some people that were so important to me. But it’s a new season and I don’t want to go backward so I did the only thing I know to do. I prayed for God to restore the relationships in a new way, in His time. I blessed them in Jesus name, released them, and I thanked Him for the feelings of sadness. I haven’t always felt sad. Most of my life, I could only feel numbness so it’s a painful celebration of healing when the sadness comes. The tears have stopped now, but I’m so thankful for those moments. I think it heightens the awareness of counting the cost of the cross and the faith to stand and say yes when God calls us to walk upon the water of the oceans where grace abounds. Where feet may fail and fear surrounds us. What glory we find in that secret place!!! Oh my goodness, I love Him so much!!!!
This is not so much a new feeling, I’ve been here before. But I didn’t know what to call it then either, all I can do is hold on and ride the mysterious waves of His love that seem to flood the room. It feels impossible to contain it all inside, I believe this is the overflow. The living waters that rise up and flow out of us. Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, I can’t believe I get to live this life!!
It feels as if I am compelled to tell everyone how amazing God’s glory clouds are and that they can really have them in their own living rooms. They are not just for the elite, they are for all of us!! They are life changing, and available, 24/7 to all of us. All we have to do is get in His presence and worship Him, let the world’s distractions fall to the ground, get your focus on the cross and the goodness of Jesus Christ and seek Him for a glory cloud. Don’t leave until it comes, don’t stop before the miracle happens! He loves you! Let Him love you! Oh my goodness, He is so good to us. I love Him so much!!!