via Daily Prompt: Encrusted

en·crust
verb
past tense: encrusted; past participle: encrusted.  To cover (something) with a hard surface layer.
The first thing that comes to mind when I read the definition of this word is my heart.  It was seriously encrusted with a protective wall that stood to protect another wall, and another wall.  NO WAY was I letting anyone past those walls.  My heart was so full of pain that it could not contain another ounce.  My purpose in life was to guard it at all costs, nothing was getting in and nothing was getting out.  The walls were so hard that they produced numbness.  I had no emotions, no expressions, and no reactions to anything when I started seeing the therapist that helped me get free.  I kept showing up for my sessions, with my walls, and slowly the Lord removed them, one brick at a time.  He never gave me more than I could handle, He just tore down one small area, and healed it completely before moving on to the next.  It was like each week a brick was replaced with soil, then eventually, there was enough of them removed that sun was allowed to peek through.  Then one day the sun was coming through brightly enough that we noticed there were seeds sprouting.  It was quite the experience, better than any Hollywood producer could ever conjure up.

 

 Love was breaking through.  1661704_lovinMeA_Standard_GDE
God tells us that He will remove our heart of stone and give us a new heart.  He surely did that for me!  Now, I find myself on the other end of the spectrum.  I feel a full range of emotions today, and sometimes I have to stop and get alone with the Lord to figure out what in the world to do with them!  It is absolutely wonderful, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I’m so thankful to be able to feel the painful things today.  I never understood that when I blocked out all the pain, I was also blocking out the good things like hope, joy, and love.  My heart is so full of those things today!!!  Today I can rejoice with those that rejoice and weep with those that weep.  I can dream, imagine, and celebrate all the amazing things that life holds for me.  Praise the Lord, He is so faithful!!  He has changed me and I will serve Him forever!  I love Him so much!!